real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
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