So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
