He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Randomize