I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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