Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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