I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
