I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
