Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
