Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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