so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
