you would pick up someone in the library
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
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