im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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