I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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