i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
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