how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize
