im about as happy as oj after his trial
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
