Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
worst night to have a conscience
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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