problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Randomize
