I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Randomize
