Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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