You're my little dorito
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
