i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
