How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Randomize
