did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
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