I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize