At least make sure they are 18
Why
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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