I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
We are two peas in an std pod
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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