so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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