Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize