So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
