I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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