If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Randomize
