So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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