Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
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