you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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