im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Yeah I should probably start planning our first conversation instead of our first child.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Randomize
