i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
