Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
