READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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