so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Randomize
