so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
