I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
