Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Randomize
