I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
