your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
Randomize
