Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Randomize