You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Do you remember whose house we're in?
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
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