Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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