Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
