Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
