There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
