The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
